Thee Moste Marveluss Museume of Misstrees is a mini RPG set in a peculiar & esoteric museum, where players share the roles of Tour Guide and Group Members to create exhibits which defy understanding.
You can PWYW for this title on DriveThruRPG or itch.io, or download a free PDF here. To get early access to monthly games, support me on Patreon.
Thee Moste Marveluss Museume of Misstrees popped into reality one day down a quiet side-street and has been there ever since and always.
It boasts the widest range of the most peculiar, esoteric, and unexpectedly interactive exhibits in the world. There is no Gift Shop, but if an item from The Collection takes a liking to a visitor, it may well go home with them.
Daily tours are offered, at 10, 2 and 4, booked via the curious curator Marjoram Pickleworth and presented by their numerous assistants. Book ahead to avoid disappointment, arrive early to be dazzled and amazed!
How To Play
To play, you will need:
- A deck of standard playing cards, shuffled, with the Jokers removed
- Index cards and a way to write things down
Players take it in turns to be either The Tour Guide or members of The Group. When a player is The Tour Guide, they draw cards and talk The Group through one of The Exhibits using prompts from their hand of cards, answering questions, and adding extra details. When players are members of The Group, they ask questions about Exhibits and propose Facts.
Once you’re set up and everyone is ready, the player who last went to a museum takes the first turn to be The Tour Guide.
The Exhibits
When it’s your turn to be The Tour Guide, draw 5 cards and choose 1 to be shuffled back into The Deck. Each card will refer you to a different piece of information about The Exhibit you are presenting to The Group. Play your 4 cards in any order you wish to create an Exhibit.
| CARD | Origin (1 Card) | Description (2 Cards) | Quirk (1 Card) |
| A | Purchased on one of Marjoram’s many holidays | Heavy, leathery, and wrinkled | Screams loudly at 1 minute to the hour |
| 2 | Left on the doorstep by a hooded stranger | Covered in abstruse scripture | Lighter than a feather, unless you try to pick it up |
| 3 | Appeared one morning and added itself to the records | Bound in iron chains | Glows in the dark, darkens in the light |
| 4 | Won at an insolvency auction for an undisclosed sum | Loosely egg-shaped | Singes the hair on anything that gets too close |
| 5 | “On loan” from a rival collection | Impaled on a brass spike | Smells strongly of meat |
| 6 | Delivered by mistake after ordering a Takeaway | Connected to several lengths of rubber tubing | Attracts dozens of snails every midnight |
| 7 | Discovered behind a bookcase | Grimy, rusted and generally befouled | Has no eyes, which follow you around the room |
| 8 | Existed here before Thee Museume & cannot be moved | Firm on top, spongy underneath | Exudes a foul odour whenever someone coughs |
| 9 | Thrown through a window on the last full moon | Covered in blinking lights | Shoots out sparks of lightning when it rains |
| 10 | Once belonged to a minor celebrity | Welded onto several metal plates | Creates 1 Toad every 45 minutes over Winter |
| J | Vomited up by one of the Toads that plague the lower levels | Sopping wet | Hums a jaunty tune |
| Q | Donated by the estate of a well-known noble | Wider than it is long | Sings a disconcerting song in a whispered voice |
| K | Discovered inside a previous exhibit | Edged with gold leaf | Melts each night and coalesces each morning |
When you have decided on cards for The Exhibit’s Origin, Description and Quirk, introduce The Exhibit. You are encouraged to elaborate on the information you have as much as possible and build on any previous ideas that The Tour Guide or The Group have put forward.
Once you have finished presenting The Exhibit, write down all the information you now know about it on an index card and add it to The Collection.
Whenever an Exhibit is added to The Collection, ask each member of The Group to draw a card (reading Ace as 1 and J, Q, K as 10), adding 2 to the result if they suggested a Fact about The Exhibit.
Whoever draws the highest value has caught the attention of The Exhibit will find it somewhere on their person when they leave Thee Museume.
The Group
When The Tour Guide has finished explaining about The Exhibit, any members of The Group may ask whatever questions they wish or offer up a Fact that they know about this particular piece. Once a Fact has been offered, The Tour Guide must choose one of the following:
- Accept the Fact & talk about how that piece of information was discovered
- Explain how that is a common misunderstanding and explain how that particular myth originated
- Say that you’ve not come across this Fact before & ask the member of The Group to elaborate
Any new information should be added to The Exhibit’s index card in The Collection.
The Exit
When each player has had at least 2 turns being The Tour Guide, or you’re all ready to go home, the game ends.
If you have an Exhibit on your person when you leave Thee Museume, describe what peculiar event befalls you on your journey home and how The Exhibit is involved.
If you have 3 or more Exhibits on your person at the end of the game, you find that you cannot leave and feel compelled to take up a position as a new staff member at Thee Museume.
Describe your new job and how it brings you Such Great Joy.
Ursidice 