Thee Moste Marveluss Museume of Misstrees

Thee Moste Marveluss Museume of Misstrees is a mini RPG set in a peculiar & esoteric museum, where players share the roles of Tour Guide and Group Members to create exhibits which defy understanding.

You can PWYW for this title on DriveThruRPG or, or download a free PDF here. To get early access to monthly games, support me on Patreon.

Thee Moste Marveluss Museume of Misstrees popped into reality one day down a quiet side-street and has been there ever since and always.

It boasts the widest range of the most peculiar, esoteric, and unexpectedly interactive exhibits in the world. There is no Gift Shop, but if an item from The Collection takes a liking to a visitor, it may well go home with them.

Daily tours are offered, at 10, 2 and 4, booked via the curious curator Marjoram Pickleworth and presented by their numerous assistants. Book ahead to avoid disappointment, arrive early to be dazzled and amazed!

A peculiar machine, which looks like a box with pistons, a whirling central fan, and some form of pump

How To Play

To play, you will need:

  • A deck of standard playing cards, shuffled, with the Jokers removed
  • Index cards and a way to write things down

Players take it in turns to be either The Tour Guide or members of The Group. When a player is The Tour Guide, they draw cards and talk The Group through one of The Exhibits using prompts from their hand of cards, answering questions, and adding extra details. When players are members of The Group, they ask questions about Exhibits and propose Facts.

Once you’re set up and everyone is ready, the player who last went to a museum takes the first turn to be The Tour Guide.

The Exhibits

When it’s your turn to be The Tour Guide, draw 5 cards and choose 1 to be shuffled back into The Deck. Each card will refer you to a different piece of information about The Exhibit you are presenting to The Group. Play your 4 cards in any order you wish to create an Exhibit.

CARDOrigin (1 Card)Description (2 Cards)Quirk (1 Card)
APurchased on one of Marjoram’s many holidaysHeavy, leathery, and wrinkledScreams loudly at 1 minute to the hour
2Left on the doorstep by a hooded strangerCovered in abstruse scriptureLighter than a feather, unless you try to pick it up
3Appeared one morning and added itself to the recordsBound in iron chainsGlows in the dark, darkens in the light
4Won at an insolvency auction for an undisclosed sumLoosely egg-shapedSinges the hair on anything that gets too close
5“On loan” from a rival collectionImpaled on a brass spikeSmells strongly of meat
6Delivered by mistake after ordering a TakeawayConnected to several lengths of rubber tubingAttracts dozens of snails every midnight
7Discovered behind a bookcaseGrimy, rusted and generally befouledHas no eyes, which follow you around the room
8Existed here before Thee Museume & cannot be movedFirm on top, spongy underneathExudes a foul odour whenever someone coughs
9Thrown through a window on the last full moonCovered in blinking lightsShoots out sparks of lightning when it rains
10Once belonged to a minor celebrityWelded onto several metal platesCreates 1 Toad every 45 minutes over Winter
JVomited up by one of the Toads that plague the lower levelsSopping wetHums a jaunty tune
QDonated by the estate of a well-known nobleWider than it is longSings a disconcerting song in a whispered voice
KDiscovered inside a previous exhibitEdged with gold leafMelts each night and coalesces each morning

When you have decided on cards for The Exhibit’s Origin, Description and Quirk, introduce The Exhibit. You are encouraged to elaborate on the information you have as much as possible and build on any previous ideas that The Tour Guide or The Group have put forward.

Once you have finished presenting The Exhibit, write down all the information you now know about it on an index card and add it to The Collection.

Whenever an Exhibit is added to The Collection, ask each member of The Group to draw a card (reading Ace as 1 and J, Q, K as 10), adding 2 to the result if they suggested a Fact about The Exhibit. 

Whoever draws the highest value has caught the attention of The Exhibit will find it somewhere on their person when they leave Thee Museume.

A long item with a round, central body, and a stick emerging from each hemisphere. The top stick has some form of leaf coming out of the top

The Group

When The Tour Guide has finished explaining about The Exhibit, any members of The Group may ask whatever questions they wish or offer up a Fact that they know about this particular piece. Once a Fact has been offered, The Tour Guide must choose one of the following:

  • Accept the Fact & talk about how that piece of information was discovered
  • Explain how that is a common misunderstanding and explain how that particular myth originated
  • Say that you’ve not come across this Fact before & ask the member of The Group to elaborate

Any new information should be added to The Exhibit’s index card in The Collection.

Some form of tubing, with different textures and two prominent ridges along the top

The Exit

When each player has had at least 2 turns being The Tour Guide, or you’re all ready to go home, the game ends.

If you have an Exhibit on your person when you leave Thee Museume, describe what peculiar event befalls you on your journey home and how The Exhibit is involved.

If you have 3 or more Exhibits on your person at the end of the game, you find that you cannot leave and feel compelled to take up a position as a new staff member at Thee Museume.

Describe your new job and how it brings you Such Great Joy.